I don’t know what to make of a new U.S. News online readers’ poll. Sarah Palin is running away from the field on the question of who will hand out the best Halloween candy. Eighty percent award the prize to Palin. Michelle Obama is second, with 7.3 percent. Sensibly, readers put Rudy Giuliani in last place. I wouldn’t accept candy from the guy, either.
Why Palin, though?
Palin is the living embodiment of Suzanne Stone Maretto, the ambitious reporter who manipulates some high school students into murdering her husband in Gus Van Sant’s 1995 black comedy, To Die For.
Played brilliantly by Nicole Kidman, Suzanne wants to be a big-time TV journalist, and she is certain that she the deserves fame, fortune and power, despite her lack of skill and experience. The one thing she does have is a pathological anti-social immorality that allows her to trash or kill anyone stupid enough to get in her way.
She winds up in ice, so to speak, a victim of her dead husband’s family’s vengeance. On ice: isn’t that where the GOP establishment wishes Palin would remain? The woman once hailed by the media as a budding starlet who could outshine Barack Obama and add a bit of sex appeal to John McCain’s campaign is now seen as, well, a kind of costumed nutcase. Maybe that explains why folks think her candy would be best.
I’ve never been big on Halloween, not even as a kid. I think it’s because in the media age, every day is Halloween. The holiday seems redundant. Doesn’t “trick or treat” seem like a fitting description of reality TV and cable news? The balloon boy family was just another gaggle of neighbors at the door asking for attention.
I think we need an anti-Halloween, a day of respite from the freaky and the foolish. Candy apples for everyone willing to be real and nice for a day. Just imagine, the doorbell rings. You open it, and there stands a neighbor in relaxed dress, a smile on his face. “Is there anything you need?” he asks.
It’s not gonna happen, of course. Instead, we wait nervously in our homes, eyes darting back and forth, worrying about who will be the next Sarah Palin in our lives. In terms of entertaining monster-ness, it’s going to be hard to top Palin. Meanwhile, I think it’s best to avoid candy altogether.
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About Glenn W. Smith
Glenn W. Smith has spent the past 30 years in journalism and politics, where he’s made a name for himself as a writer, campaign manager, activist, think tank analyst and, as Daily Kos founder Markos Moulitsas says, a “legendary political consultant and all-around good guy.” “There’s no one like him,” says author George Lakoff. CNN commentator Paul Begala says, “He has unmatched experience, a graceful pen (or pixel nowadays) and deep insight into the best and worst of us.” Novelist Sarah Bird speaks of his “lucid and lyrical” prose. And, she says, he’s fun. Huffington Post founder Arianna Huffington says Glenn writes with “grace and abundant humor” and “uses his colorful experiences in Texas to enlighten us all.”
Smith led Ann Richards’ successful 1990 campaign for Governor of Texas. He worked for former Texas Lt. Gov. Bill Hobby and U.S. Senator Lloyd Bentsen. Earlier, Smith was a political reporter for the Houston Chronicle and the Houston Post. He’s coordinated national campaigns for groups such as MoveOn.org. In 2004, he authored the highly acclaimed book, The Politics of Deceit: Saving Freedom and Democracy from Extinction. He also wrote Unfit Commander, a book that detailed George W. Bush’s mysterious disappearance from military service.
In 2004, Smith was featured in the film, Bush’s Brain, a documentary about Karl Rove. Smith provided commentary on Rove’s role as then-President Bush’s senior advisor. He has made numerous media appearances with Chris Mathews on Hardball, Joe Scarborough, Brit Hume, and many others. He writes a regularly for top national web sites, including FireDogLake and Huffington Post.
As a senior fellow at George Lakoff’s prestigious Rockridge Institute in Berkeley he studied, wrote and taught on the power of metaphor and narrative in political communications. He also lectured on religion and politics at the Starr King School for Ministry in Berkeley. As a sponsor and organizer, he has pulled together numerous national events with progressive religious leaders. He also organized a celebration of Dr. Martin Luther King at Riverside Church in New York City as well as “Freedom and Faith” bus tours, which was a nationwide campaign for social justice and progressive values.
Smith’s play, Double Play, which explored American Western myths and legends, was held over to sold-out audiences. He’s even written and performed songs in the Americana tradition, such as his best-known song, “Helping Marty Robbins,” a tribute to his hometown, Houston.
Most recently, Smith is the creator of DogCanyon, a political and cultural web site covering state, national and global issues from a Texas perspective. DogCanyon is an exhilarating and unique site that gets the connections between politics and culture and explores both the personal side of politics and the ups, down, craziness and beauty of “life its ownself,” as humorist Dan Jenkins would say. DogCanyon offers heartfelt personal essays, hard-hitting political analysis, and, most importantly, laughs.
As Paul Begala said, Smith writes in “the finest, firmest, fearless tradition of Texas essayists like Molly Ivins.”
“worrying about who will be the next Sarah Palin in our lives”
Then you open the door in the Halloween twilight and there stands a 4 foot version of – wreenk, wreenk, wreenk – Sara Palin.
Of course you realize it’s just a kid dressed by her politically humorous parents, but below the surface it will be disturbing.
Throw candy corn, close the door…